Talk To Me, Goose!

It’s almost been a month since I posted my open letter revealing my mood disorders and all of their facets. So what has been different in these past weeks? Some days nothing and some days everything, it really depends on who I encounter for the day. I am very appreciative of the support I’ve gotten from so many. My spouse, my parents, my brother and sister-in-law, two of my closest friends, my boss, and numerous coworkers have all shown such love and support and I am so grateful. They ask questions about my feelings and about my therapy sessions, and while in the beginning I was nervous to speak about either, I am starting to enjoy talking about both! I love sharing what crazy tests and challenges I’ve been given by my therapist and while sometimes it’s uncomfortable to talk about my feelings or my faults, I feel so relieved after I do.

But to those of you who don’t ask, I’m not mad! Maybe you don’t know what to ask or how to ask. That’s ok, you don’t even have to! But ignoring me out of ignorance hurts my feelings. I’m still the same Mandy! I will still talk sports with you all day, I will still tell lame jokes all day, I will still tell you how stupid deer hunting is all day, and I will still tell you funny stories about MJ all day! Everyone who knows me (even a little) knows I love to talk. We don’t have to talk about my disorders, but I will answer any questions you might have. Or, we can talk about the weather, but not the Chicago Bears. Once again though, ignoring me doesn’t make anything better. It’s ok if you’re uncomfortable, but silence is the worst response. Please don’t shut me out.

That being said, I want to address another topic. Those who don’t support me or think this is a “poor me” show- you don’t get to tell me I am fine and this is all just in my head. Trust me, I’ve been telling myself that for 11 years and it’s a lie. If you can’t get on board with the reality of mental illness, whether it’s mine or someone else’s, at this point in my life, I am going to have to cut ties with you.

I have clung to something a colleague told me, “Diabetes-treat it, Asthma-treat it, Bipolar-treat it. A disease is a disease is a disease.”

If you think you have any, some, or all of my symptoms—talk to me! I’m going to be the last person to judge you. Maybe you’re not into seeking help and that’s ok, we can just chat. Maybe you’re not sure if you need help, that’s ok, we can chat! I hate that some of you are living the same things as I am, but it is a little refreshing to know I’m not alone… so talk to me, Goose!