Seeking to Understand

June is Pride Month and I am seeking to understand. Not judge, but understand. I am not anti-pride month, I am not a homophobe, and I am not discriminating, but I am trying to learn. What is offensive and what is acceptable? What lines cannot be crossed, what things cannot be said? How do I show love and support? No fault of anyone’s, I was raised in small-town, heavily conservative, Christian area. I am naïve. I was taught the Bible says homosexuality is wrong, but yet God loves and forgives all. I choose to love all and not rely so heavily on the words printed in the Bible when it comes to this specifically. What is so wrong with love if it is not hetero love?

Everyone has their own opinions, and that is fine. You don’t have to agree with mine, because I don’t even really know what my opinion is! And if I am this confused as a bystander, I can’t imagine how confused and unsure others are trying to be something they are not.

The only thing I know for sure is, if one day my daughter(s) come to me and say they are part of the LGBTQ community I will whole-heartedly support them. I do not want them to ever doubt themselves or go back on something stupid I may have said in front of them because I chose hate instead of admitting ignorance.

How do I teach my children the word of God when I, myself, get confused by it? I want them to believe in kindness and love. I want them to treat everyone with respect. I want them to be better than I was and still am. I do not want them to judge or be judged. I admit I have not always been the best at that, but I do hope that I learn, grow, and change. I hope I can be the teacher, role-model, and mother they need to grow up in this world today.

It is not 1980, it is not 1990, it is 2023 and things are so much different. I am different; and different is ok. Different is learning. Different is growing. Different is seeking to understand!

“You can’t help who you love… you’re not supposed to.” -The greatest movie of 2001